Here I sit. With picture ready to post, but no words to share. This is an intriguing season for me as I love words, and sharing words with others. I have found myself in a place in time without words to describe what is going on in my heart and head and it’s strange. I will chalk it partly up to being extremely tired with this sweet babe growing in my womb… Taking up space, causing lots of dizziness and using up all my brain power as of late. (I mean what mom in their right mind would touch an electric fence… 😂)
Also with my tiredness I become slightly anti-social. I mean I love some good face time with a dear friend and hearing our voices connect. It’s beautiful. But as far as social media goes, I’ve gotten very tired. Tired of keeping up. Sure, social media is great! But sometimes the busyness of it all along with my already busy life, gets so loud to me. I then find myself wanting to run and find the nearest quiet corner and give me a “timeout” to just breathe, think and not have a million thoughts running in my head.
However, I am a person that CRAVES community and interaction with others. I thrive in it! But I don’t it all that often with others my age. In a season where I’m feeling lonely, I can definitely admit that I will post something just to talk to people. If I get a couple comments it really makes me feel good! Just to know someone out there is checking in on me and reading my posts is a nice thought! Feels like they care! (Which they do!) But if I get zero comments, then the lie that I am misunderstood or not cared for sneaks in. But that is false. There are plenty of people who do care for me and I cannot let social media dictate how I feel on any given day.
I’ve noticed this for the vast majority of the population, including myself. Our worth is not found in social media, but in the Creator of Heaven and earth! I must choose to stop caring how others view me, and choose to believe what Jesus says is true of me! This has been a process and it’s been hard and beautiful. Since our women’s retreat, it was amazing to just let God’s social networking work (face to face interactions) it was in the hearing of each other’s stories where healing could start. In the tears of knowing that we weren’t alone in our struggles! And in the hug of another persons arms, knowing they care and could empathize with you. While there is a time and place for social media! It just can’t be where we go to, to find our worth. It’s in Jesus, and it’s in community with others!
I can say I do miss my interactions with the sweet friends I’ve made in the awesome IG community. (In which thank God for phones and texting! It’s a good way to keep up) But I have noticed my time being used up more wisely and I must say, I am enjoying it! I am filling it with more snuggles, hugs, walks, stories, kickball games, garden building and naps! Ahhh… Those naps though. 😃 Plus our kids love all the extra time they gain from mom and dad – especially when they aren’t set in front of a tv or their parents faces hiding behind a phone. It’s in being intentional where relationships grow! Most of all I have been working to fill up even more of my extra time by filling up my spirit with Holy Spirit. I could always spend more time with Him and learning to lean and listen more intently.
All of this to say… I am unplugging and reconnecting to what is truth. ❤️